Influenster, Rebirth, Pheonyx?!

Hey guys! I haven't used this blog at all in the last year, and very randomly the years before. I don't even remember why I started it in the first place.
I DO know that I tried to restart over the summer, with book reviews. Great in theory, but after school starts up again, you find you simply do NOT have time for writing about the books you read. Barely enough time to read them!

Anyways, the real reason I'm writing this:
I recently joined a thing on the internets called Influenster! Basically you review products and such, and earn points by doing several things like that, and they'll send you new, hip, cool products to try! FOR FREE! *Giant light up dollar signs flash*
Yes, YOU could be up to date with what all the kids are using these days!

However, you have to review the products that are sent to you. Whether on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Youtube (hahaha), your blog *cough*, or whatever new social networks crop up (it's only a matter of time...).
Which is, you know. Why I'm starting to write on here again.

REVIEWS! I WILL be starting up my book reviews again, I think. But I'll also be reviewing products. This is actually something I've been contemplating for a while now (roughly the last six months). Mostly because I find myself looking up reviews CONSTANTLY. I try to be really good with my money (most of it's spent on books despite whatever I tell you), and sometimes products are just too expensive to pay for and then find out you don't like it for some reason...
Yet, reviews seem to avoid giving me an honest answer. Usually.

So this is basically just a kick in the bum to make me get onto this!

I was emailed this morning to know that I'm getting the Frosty Vox Box, so I should have products to review soon! And I'm going to try to keep up with book reviews. Maybe two a month or something. I really don't know what I'll have time for.
I have time to spend hours doing nothing on the internet, but whenever I sit down to do what I'm SUPPOSED to do, I suddenly remember twenty things that are more important.

Hope this will be fun for you guys! If you think you're interested in Influenster, go ahead and let me know! I'll send you a link! I'll earn points for the referral, too! *Wink wink*

~Monkey

Review: Beneath the Glitter (Elle and Blair Fowler)

Beneath the Glitter (Elle and Blair Fowler)

This book starts out with two sisters being thrust into the lime light of Los Angeles.

Ava and Sophia London come across as a bit light headed at first, and if you’re anything like me, you’ll be cringing through the first chapter. Honestly, I was tempted to put it down. It appeared that it would quickly turn into one of those meaningless books with zero conflict aside from broken nails and shoe sales without your size, but I was actually quite pleasantly surprised when I forced myself further.

Ava and Sophia are two sisters that are almost polar opposites, yet they get along seemingly well. UNTIL boys, work, friends, and even animals get in the way. It showed the loving bonds of sisterhood, and how simply things can be torn apart, and how hard it can be to patch them up again. I enjoyed the values they displayed, and it was fun picking sides.  

You warm to the characters quickly, and half way through I was yelling at them about what to do… In other words, you get into it after a bit.

Even though the start was slow, you quickly adapt to the writing style of these two gorgeous sisters, and I found myself enveloped into the world they created.

The conflict was not too out there, but it wasn’t completely lacking. It seemed more of the actual conflict you would go through. Quite realistic, I think.

It was the first in a series, and I will definitely be checking out the next one when it comes out. This summer, I think?

They do cuss a few times, and there were a few 'adult' references, nothing R-rated though. More along the lines of PG-13. I wouldn’t want anyone under the age of 13 reading it, but above that you should be fine. Even a bit below, probably, but that depends on your preferences for your children.

On a scale of 1-10, I give it a 6 for the delightful characters, the whimsical ideas, and how you feel like you’re friends with the charming sisters by the end. 

I'm sorry... I'm so, so sorry.

Hello... I have zero subscribers, I know, but I feel like I need to apologize anyways. I know I have at least two friends who check up on here every now and then even though they don't know how to subscribe or something, but, regardless.
I've really been ignoring this page. Because I suck. And really, because I'm not completely interesting.
My life is boring, from an outsiders perspective. I'm just the little hermit of an introvert that maybe sees one friend a week or so.
I excel in fiction, but I don't want *that* on here... I write on paper, not computer, anyways. (Did that last sentence sound slightly cave man techie to you, too?)
BUT I have decided to do something that will at least give me something to write about...
REVIEWS!
Since I DO read and watch movies a lot (more so books, but you know), I'm going to be writing my reviews of them!
I'm actually quite excited about this. I'm a pretty good critic, if I do say so myself. ;)
Plus, how often are you browsing through the fiction section to find something, only to check it out and have to put it down half way through because it's COMPLETELY AWFUL.
But then, if you're like me, you still have to finish it, even though it's worse than ectoplasma on the tongue.
So, I'm going to try and save you the trouble.
I'll just write about whatever books I've read from the library, or any movies I've seen recently, and try to be fair.
IF I'm going to be giving away a spoiler (which I do sometimes), I will warn you with a nice big [SPOILER ALERT] before doing so.
But yeah, I think that's about it for now!

Monkey

Hate Letter

Dear Bald One,

Okay, so this is pretty random, but...
WHO GOES TO THE BATHROOM IN THE DARK?
Honestly. Light switch. Right there....
You could just click it on.. Or not?
WHY WOULD YOU NOT TURN THE LIGHT ON.
ARE YOU NOT AWARE THAT A SERIAL KILLER IS QUITE POSSIBLY WAITING BEHIND THE SHOWER CURTAIN AND NOW HAS THE OPPORTUNITY TO KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU LEFT THE LIGHTS OFF?!
Or are you just a weirdo?
Do you like turning off the light so your other senses will be enhanced? Such as... Hearing? Or smell? Because that's kind of creepy since you're in the FLUFFING BATHROOM, YOU CREEPO.
I'm just thanking god that I knocked. Otherwise, I would have seen you on the Lou. And oh God... The horror... The horror!
I'm really getting tired of your crap. Since I'm not going to disclose your name in fear that you actually find this and my mom gets mad at me, I shall call you Tyrone.
Tyrone, you are a total jerk.
I'm a Christian, and sometimes it's hard to find words that are violent enough to show my anger.
You little flutterwidget.
Biscottibopper.
Chocolatemonger.
That one actually sounds kind of good, so don't listen to that one.
Because you aren't good enough for it.
All of the chocolatemongers of the world are better than you.

Ahem.
Anyways, I'm getting really sick of you.
Here's an example of one of the many, many reasons why:
I'm sitting at the kitchen table, doing school, like a darling child.
You come in. From work. Or whatever you do all day.
And you sit down on the couch. In the living room.
You turn on the TV. Which is RIGHT next to the kitchen opening, where I'm doing school.
You then find the most inappropriate movie you can, and watch it.
I'm forced to retreat to my bedroom and do school where my mom is sleeping. In the dark.
JerkMcTurdBucket.

There are no words to explain exactly how violent my hate is for you.
You're just a mean person, really.
I hope you starve to death in a glass house surrounded by beautiful chocolate waterfalls, and the floors are made out of lego's.
While you listen to Niki Minaj songs on repeat.
And drink nothing but lemon juice.
And your only human interaction is Kim Kardashian, who visits you once every week and complains about losing her earrings or something. Or about how she's poor. And better than other people.
But most of all, how she's better than you.

I think I've made my point.
Sincerely (hopeyoudie),
The Monkey

Emotional Trauma From Television Shows.

I'm experiencing trauma at the hands of a television show.

Seriously, why? Of all things, why is it a TELEVISION SHOW makes me want to cry.

In case you're wondering, it's Doctor Who.

Yeah, I just saw Doomsday.

I've been watching DT for about.. Um.. About a year now, but I seriously procrastinate watching it. 

So it's taken me this long.

Plus, I didn't want to face the inevitable tears.

One thing about being surrounded by other Whovians, is that you know what's coming. 

So you wait.

And then you weep.

Slow, sad, miserable tears...

I try writing on my books to get my mind off of it.

I try reading other books to get my mind off of it.

Nothing works. The only thing I can really do is keep watching, and I keep having to confront the sadness.

WHY. 

Introducing Scrags McCarmich

Scrags McCarmich struggled against the snow. 


His tiny paws were so numb from the cold, he couldn't get a proper grip on any of the 

trees. 


The fury in his eyes was enough to make any squirrel stay warm through the blizzard. 

Booted out of his very own home by the dubious Judge Wills, the one who stole away his 

love. 


Ah Tissie, just the thought of her brought a tear to his eyes. 


"I'll find you, m' Love. I promise." He whispered against the wind, gritting his teeth.


None of the other squirrels would accept him into their homes against the cold. His fur 

would normally be 

enough, but he'd been wandering for hours. The snow was matted in his course coat, and 

the closer it got to  his body the more it melted.

Scrags looked heavenwards and sent out a small prayer.


Then, as if his prayer had been answered that quickly, he spied something.


A small mound in the snow, but as he got closer, he saw a tunnel.


He got down on his paws and crawled inside. 


It was a tiny little igloo, with a small bed carved out of the packed snow. There was a 

generous pile of seeds in the corner on another carving, he took to be a table. 

It was just for him, he knew it. God had sent him a home. 


He would wait out the storm, and when it was over... He would find Tissie. 


And then, Revenge.


................................................................


So yeah, I made a tiny squirrel igloo yesterday. 

What did *you* do?

Picnik Tables.

Eh.
That's pretty much my life right now. Just... Eh.
I've been writing, a ton. Don't worry, my stories and poems are SO much better than my blog.
Mostly for the reason that my blog is about my life, and my life is boring.
The most exciting parts of my life is when it's following someone else's.
Reading books, watching tv shows... Those are some of the most interesting parts right now.
Mostly I'm just lonely.
Usually it's just me with my computer, my pencils, and my books... That's all I really have, when I'm not home.
When I am home, I get to see my friends, and hang out with my mum. But somehow.. It's still. Lonely.
I miss my brothers. I miss my dad...  But at the same time, I don't.
I don't miss.. This version of my dad. I miss my old dad.
The dad that would take me off to just go hang out, just the two of us.
We never did anything important, just.. Small things.
One of our favorite things to do was to go to the nice walk around park, with the giant pond lake thing in the middle, and we would bring our old bread. Or we'd buy some really cheap bread at the store.
And we'd feed the ducks.
When I was little, I was so scared of them. I always put on a brave front, pretending I wasn't, but when they realized I had food, they would all start coming at me and honking at me! There were geese too, not just ducks. And then I would get frightened, and jump up onto one of the picnic tables.
From up there, I could... Be safe. Feed them from a distance, and from up there... I could see them so much clearer.
I saw the bullies, the ones that wouldn't let the others eat anything, and used their size for dominance.
I hated those.
Then there were the timid ones around the edge, they were always too scared to come in close because the bigger ones would hurt them.
Then.. There was always ONE. One that would always be my favorite. One that would come RIGHT under the picnic table, where none of the others were, and just wait for me to poke the pieces of bread through the slots in the wiring of the table.
So smart, so sly little goose!
Now... I can't help but wonder.
Where's my picnic table?
Where do I go to see things clearer? To not get hurt? To understand what's going on with all the things around me?
Where do I go where it's safe... And I can figure things out.
But worse of all, what if what I see isn't what I want to?
What if I realize that I am treating dad wrong...
What if I see my worst fears confirmed..
That it is my fault.
The things I saw, and didn't tell anyone else about.
My brain is blocking them out, but subtle, subtle memories come in, every now and then..
I can't place them correctly on the time line, but I am almost POSITIVE... That I do know when they were.
And that just tells me how much I've let everyone else down...
And how much I've let myself down by doing so.

~The Moneky